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DISCO DAVES TUNNEL GUIDE
Doors
One wonders if Jim Morrison in between drink, drugs, sex, more drink, a few poems and a little music could have come up with a design for the the ultimate tunnel door???
Type (A)Hinged Steel plate door
Try to obtain as much quarter inch or half inch steel plate as possible as well as inch or 2 inch angle iron. Ideally a supportive local who has access to a welder and workshop will construct the doors for you or at least help you obtain the metal. Man hole covers are ideal but will require oxy acetylene - cutting gear to cut it to the right size.
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Drop bolts will be required as well as large robust hinges. The door itself should fit tightly within the the angle iron frame. To ensure this build the frame around the door with holes at the bottom for the drop bolts. Once shut any gap between the frame and the door will allow the bailiff to use a crow bar to lever the door open. So make the effort and confront the MIB with as flat a surface as possible. A "U " bend piece of metal welded to the back of the door will allow a person with a D lock to lock themselves to the door (How long a person could last in such an uncomfortable position depends on the individual). Bendable steel bars of about two foot long should be welded around the frame.
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Excavate at least a 2 foot depth from around where the door is going to sit in the tunnel. Bend the steel bar as much as possible so as to allow the door and frame to be dragged into the tunnel. Once in position bend the steel bars open and concrete. The smaller the door size the better. The bailiffs will undoubtedly try to gain access by using an angle grinder on the door if they feel it is large enough for them to move through safely. A small door will mean they will have to try to dig through a much tougher concrete surround. Installing the air pipe within the concrete will make the bailiffs job a great deal more difficult forcing them to dig at the concrete with hand tools instead of using a pneumatic drill. This is probably one of the simplest tunnel door constructions with a great deal of variation possible on this basic design.
The disadvantage with a steel plate door is that the bailiffs will only require an angle grinder to cut away at the door before they have room to reach through a hole and open the bolts. (doing this of course will be impossible if someone's D locked to the other side ). Doors constructed using a number of materials (composite ) will force them to keep going back and forth down a narrow passage with different tools . These doors can be hinged like the steel plate door or lifted into place and secured . They can be made to be as strong if not stronger than the surrounding concrete and would thus allow the tunnel protester to make a door that is larger than would be advisable if it were just made of steel plate.
(A)Construct a hollow steel box that is at least 2 inches wide by approximately 3 foot square. Cut a piece of steel to act as a lid and attach two handles to it.
(B)Within the box put in the concrete mix. Don't fill the box in one load as this may prove to heavy for even two people to lift.
(C) Make a frame out of steel. This should be with a piece of steel plate (1) to act as ledge and to rest the door on.Then on either side of the door should be- two upright pieces of 2" angle iron (2) which the door will rest against,to prevent it falling forward. On the entrance side of the angle iron frame weld two steel plates to the edge * (3) to prevent the bailiff cutting the angle and pulling the door out. Then on the inside of the frame weld a further two pieces of plate (4) which will have hooks or rings, fixed to it.
Once the door has been-lifted into place a number of steel bars can can be put through rings or on hooks to prevent the door being pushed back. As with the steel plate door weld bars to the frame so that it remains firmly in place once cemented.
Portcullises fall into two basic types, those that once dropped, are light enough to be pulled up with ease by one person and those that are made of such heavy material that once dropped or lowered they require a jack to lift them up again. Both types of tunnel will require an area above the tunnel for them to be stored when not in use.
Frame
The strength and thickness of the frame will be dependent on the weight of the portcullis. Four pieces of angle iron that are over twice the length of the door should be welded together to form a channel for the portcullis to slide up and down in.
As with composite and steel plate doors weld bendable steel bars to the out side of the angle iron to secure the frame within the concrete surround. With an open cast tunnel the thickness and strength of the portcullis can be whatever the tunneller desires. However a one inch steel plate door will be too heavy for a tunneller to lift back up . If for example the portcullis is dropped because of a phoney eviction alert. By welding small pieces of angle at intervals to the inside of the door then using a car bottle jack . The tunneller will then be able to slowly jack the door back up . (see below)
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Place the jack under the second stop and on a piece of wood. Jack the door up until the jack reaches its maximum height. Then place another block of wood to hold the portcullis in its new position ,while the jack is removed . Continue in this fashion until the door is back to its open position .Though this process will take 45 minutes or more to complete the delay the door will cause the bailiffs will make it worth the effort.
Once the door is in its open position secure the door on each side with a half inch pin that can be inserted through the angle iron. Go to a shop and buy them new rather than pick up two rusty old things found lying around on the campsite. As you crawl to bed every night it will give you piece of mind knowing that the heavy lump of steel just above your head is firmly secured and not about to slice you in two. In the unlikely event that someone pulls out the pins by accident it is a good idea to put a small hole in the end of the half inch pin which can be inserted a blunt 3 inch nail or similar.
To close the door remove the blunt nails.Then the tunneller sitting some distance away should jerk the pins out with two ropes.
Its imperative the tunneller wears some form of ear protection as the noise of the door sliding down in an enclosed area will be deafening. Remember to keep the door well oiled and to keep a bottle jack and blocks on the inside of the door.
Doors by the professor Von Wolfgang Henrich Gwindelberg method .
So who is Wolfgang Gwindelberg?- Well he is actually a totally fictitious character in my head I just thought that as nutty German professors seem to come out with quite a lot of harebrained (but usually quite brilliant) ideas. I decided to dedicate this one to my pal Wolfie .
So let's suppose you're in the tunnel during the eviction watching the MIBs slowly shore their tunnel towards you. The tunnel has no doors, no worm holes, no nothing in fact it's rather shit. But you have cardboard !-no, let's say you have quite thick plyboard lying right beside you .
So you think . "If I put this thin piece of board up across the tunnel so blocking their progress and lie against it,what would the MIbs do ?". With the board preventing them seeing what's on the other side, they're blind but they know there's someone lying against it.
So then,do they kick it in and possibly injure the person on the other side or do they dig round it? As it's never been tried before one cannot be certain, but there is is a very good chance they will opt for the latter for two reasons: the first is they do not want to injure anyone ( especially not a female). The second is, that to go round will add days onto the eviction and pounds in their (the MIB's) pockets.
Of course pressured to speed up the job, they may just dig away at the sides of the board to try to pull it towards them and see what's on the other side. At which point you just back further down the tunnel with your board to form another obstruction, leaving them having just wasted two hours work.
All sounds a bit mad, -well, blame von Gwindelberg, nothing to do with me.
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